a pre-prepared post!! woots. though it seems as if no one’s responding eh. hm.
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well now, this will be one of those “shorter” entries but still generally philosophical heh.
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To help you non-Singaporeans understand some of the context here, let me explain some laws we have in Singapore. In recent years, the government has moved to ban smoking in most public areas, most notably eating areas, bus stops, clubs and pubs, among others.
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I was really pleased at this development because i’m one of those obnoxious people that cannot stand cigarette smoke. If anyone within a ten metre radius of me lights up, I sniff the air like a blood hound and make annoyed faces and noises. Yea. So when the rule became more widespread, I started becoming very open about being disapproving of people who’d smoke at bus stops or other prohibited areas. I’d pretend to snap pictures of them on my phone camera (yes, Brenda, to pretend to send to Stomp! lol) and stare them down.
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go ahead, blow yourself out
About a week or two ago, I was at the bus stop near my house waiting for a bus. I was vaguely aware of someone sitting behind me after awhile, but didn’t pay attention until I smelt cigarette smoke. Annoyed, I turned to see who the culprit was. Apart from an innocent looking young(ish) guy sitting behind me, I didn’t see anyone else. I put it down to someone in a nearby house smoking out their window or something. I grew progressively more annoyed as time passed but couldn’t find anyone to blame it on!
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The bus soon arrived and I stood up and moved to the front of the bus stop. Then, I managed to take a good look at the guy who was seated behind me and lo and behold, he was holding a fag in his hand, enjoying the last of his smoke before getting onto the bus.
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At this point I had some major conflicting emotions. I was really pissed off at him for smoking at a bus stop (he was INSIDE the bus stop, sitting down!! as opposed to standing a few metres away!) but at the same time, I didn’t really feel too angry towards him..
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Why? Well look at the title of this post. Haha. He was… kinda cute, I guess. And it definitely made me less angry at him. I was a lot more willing to let it go and not fuss too much about it… Until I realized how superficial I was being. Typically the offenders that get on my nerves are ugly, wrinkled old men at a different bus stop (that sees a totally different demographic of commuters altogether) and that, compounded with the smoke, just drives me nuts.
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How about you guys? Do you tend to go easy on attractive people? It’s natural, isn’t it? I’m sure i’m not the only one. I remember when I was in college we once read about a research project that looked at the relationship between a person’s attractiveness and the kind of punishment they are dealt when caught/tried. Mostly, attractive people were punished more lightly than not-so-attractive people unless they were deemed to have used their attractiveness to their advantage when committing the act.
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Cool, huh? =) Ok so let’s all try to stop judging books by their covers.. That’s the moral of the story today. Till the next time, CIAOOOO <3
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Nope. I tend to be more critical/harsh on pretty girl/boy when they do something bad. hehe
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chervalier Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 10:30 pm
@Cherie,
that was DAAMMNN fast, cherie. lol. yea i think you’re super nice to pretty girls/boys hahahaha =P
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haha.
helpless fact.
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chervalier Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 10:42 pm
@jt,
true. haha. human nature.
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Halo/devil effect! Well I usually look at the person’s body language and facial expression, etc. rather than appearance when they offend me. But in your case, you already automatically assumed the cute guy couldn’t be smoking! Tsk tsk.
(p.s. can’t you use no-break space or br tag to fix the paragraphs?)
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chervalier Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 10:41 pm
@yarndink,
too.much.comms.speak!! haha
i couldn’t be bothered to look into the code of the theme so am just looking for a quick fix heh
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I’ve realised that myself in the past as well!
(Don’t really get out much to get offended nowadays+don’t meet enough hot people who happen to offend me. XD)
Like, if someone is a lech to you and it’s an ugly old man, I’d be annoyed….but what if it’s a cute guy. >.> Pretty people have it better, unless others are jealous of them. XD
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chervalier Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 8:54 pm
@jenn,
lol. yea it’s human nature.. heh!
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I think I’ll subconsciously go easier on attractive people, but I try to keep my actions consistent. It’s hard to turn off the part of your brain that judges people by their appearance/first impression, though!
I really dislike smoking, but I live in a city where it’s not very common. I’m always surprised when I go elsewhere and come across a lot of smokers. I try not to blame the smoker, though, because they could be addicted and trying to quit… XD
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chervalier Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 8:55 pm
@Kaylee,
well at least you’re aware you might go easier on them so u take an active step to prevent t! heh
what city do you live in? i hate going to places where they allow smoking more or less everywhere!
i don’t mind the smokers who are at least consciously trying to quite but I really do detest people who smoke and I’ve a theory that might not be too kind so.. yea.. heh
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Hm, I’m hard on anyone who decides that smoking is a good idea for them. Why pay someone to kill yourself? I know it’s hard to stop, and I know everyone’s situation is different, but I guess I just can’t help by disagree with their original choice to start smoking.
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chervalier Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 11:57 pm
@Regina,
agreed!! completely agree. I don’t see a reason for smoking AT ALL.
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I think it’s an inevitable fact of life that we all judge by appearance, but as long as we are all aware of that fact and as long as we don’t let that first impression dictate future impressions, I think we’re fine. Plus, I think mannerisms are more important than appearance alone (kinda like what yarndink said). But I think if I saw an attractive guy smoking, his attractiveness would plummet instead of his smoking-offensiveness
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chervalier Reply:
April 10th, 2010 at 12:00 am
@Meg,
i agree about the level of attractiveness falling if mannerisms got in the way, but in this case I wasn’t attracted to the guy so there wasn’t a way in which his attractiveness could “plummet”.. I don’t know how to explain this better.. haha. but i completely agree that behavior can totally ruin attractiveness
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Hahaha at the STOMP comment. Let’s not resort to STOMP luh – that’s possibly the lowest-level Singaporeans can go, methinks. (; Let’s just stick to blogs. And perhaps exchanging our ‘caught in the act’ photo collections among one another. More fun that way.
Like you, I also have zero tolerance for cigarette smoke and smoking in general. Not because of my allergies and whatnot, but it’s just … inconsiderate, methinks. A substantial percentage of lung cancer sufferers are non-smokers, but ended up in that state because of passive smoking – from breathing in smoke-polluted air from them smokers they encounter regularly.
It’s quite a sad situation, but there is very little people can do since these smokers are usually strangers not within their control.
There are some bad apples around as well who purposely exhale smoke right into peoples’ faces as they walk past. (Well, whether it is on purpose is debatable – but it’s far too many coincidences for it to not be on purpose. o.O) Those are the absolute worst.
With regard to varying tolerance levels for smoking w.r.t the appearance of the person – my tolerance (or lack of) is pretty much the same for all. (; Regardless of looks, smoking IS still harmful – to the person and everyone else around them. The harmful effects of smoking is not going to escape anyone because he/she is good looking or otherwise. Likewise, the cigarette smoke exhaled by a beautiful person will not harm the people around them any less than the smoke exhaled by someone less attractive. The two factors are completely unrelated!
That’s just my logic lah. Haha.
I understand where you’re coming from, by the way.
I studied that in Psychology a coupla’ years back. Apparently, people generally have larger tolerances for better-looking people. Not just about smoking per se, but for a wide range of other factors as well. For example, if someone walks past and steps on your foot, you are more inclined to get angry at the person if he/she is ugly as compared to when he/she is attractive. Part of the reason stems from the ego – we tend to want an attractive person to like us, which is why we try to curb anger responses more towards these people. (;
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chervalier Reply:
April 12th, 2010 at 9:24 am
@Brenda,
lol i won’t actually send them to Stomp haha i will pretend to though =D yes our ‘caught in the act’ photos are pretty hilarious huh hahahahha
eesh! it’s true, i feel really sad for those who get lung cancer or whatnot from passive smoking. it’s truly utterly inconsiderate of smokers who do that.
I hate when I’m walking home or just along the road and the person in front of me is smoking. I’ll always walk faster to overtake them so that I don’t have to breathe in their smoke!
haha i agree about the appearance of the person. my impression of the person definitely plummets once i see a person smoke. i would never ever date a person who smokes, actually. so yea.. it was an example of how appearance affects me rather than how smoking affects my impression of a person haha
your logic is good. makes sense. haha.
haha yes yes there have been lots of studies about this.. I also learned a lot about this in soci, psych and interpersonal comms.. ahaha
thanks for your loooooooooong comment heheheh!
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We also have that law here now and restaurants do indeed follow that. I also HATE the smell of smoke and maybe it’s because my dad has been smoking ever since I was born and ugh, don’t really like it. Am trying to help him stop even. I tell him that if he even lights up a cig, I’m gonna smoke myself! ARGH! But I can see the smoker’s dilemma in my dad, they are ADDICTED TO IT. Not even nicotine patches can help because what they want is the SMOKE TOO. Gosh… I really hope my dad can stop now…
I agree that our first impression is based on looks because that’s the only thing we see at first usually. I’d get turned off by smoking but if he’s a really cute guy, I don’t know. I’d react the same way as you unless I know that cute guy and his behavior is HORRID. Now that’s something different. hehee
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chervalier Reply:
April 12th, 2010 at 9:29 am
@tiff k,
hey there tiff!!
wow.. good luck with your dad.. I hope for your family’s sake that he’s able to beat the addiction.. =)
hehe yes i think knowing a person’s character is really important as well =))
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As for me, if anyone smokes regardless of the fact that they’re cute, I’d immediately deduct 100/100 points for the category “decent”.
Sure, if they want to smoke, go on. Just make sure their smoke does not reach my lungs. I don’t want to die of lung cancer. Some argue that smoking is a social drug (just like alcohol is a social “pleasure”) I still don’t see why they should do it in the open.
Worse still, I can’t bear to see parents smoking with their children around. Sometimes I’d like to punch them in the face for that.
No matter what, I think smoking is bad.
I tend to not judge by looks simply because I know I’ve been wrong so many times. I used to have the idea that good looking people = nice and perfect people. Boy was I wrong. So I’m quite impartial to those who look good and those who aren’t as attractive.
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chervalier Reply:
April 12th, 2010 at 9:32 am
@Chien,
yea that’s pretty true. like i mentioned in a comment above, i’d never consider dating/liking anyone who smoked. whatever it was that might have appealed to me would totally lose its appeal thanks to the smoking.
i agree! get your smoke away from me!
I know of some parents who smoke around their children. (see tiff k’s comment above) it’s really sad because their family will be breathing in a lot of the second-hand smoke and without the filters from the cigarettes, the smoke is a lot more toxic to them.
haha it’s quite a feat to remain impartial so hats off to you! =)
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